This story began around the holidays (although I would later discover it actually started months earlier....I just didn’t know it at the time).
Some time in December, I discovered a very creepy looking bug on the wall in my bedroom. It wasn’t a cockroach and it wasn’t a spider. This thing had a body about the size of a nickel, with plenty of legs and stuff, that made it look much bigger. It had a hard shell and could crawl and fly.
I scooped the intruder up in an old pill container (which surprise, surprise, I have a surplus of) and then flushed it down the toilet. It was gone, I was happy and I figured that was the end of the story. WRONG!!
Soon, almost every day, one or two of these creepy bugs kept showing up. Most were found in my bedroom, with a few in the kitchen and living room. Each time I discovered another gross bug, my patience grew thinner as I continued flushing them down the toilet and wondering where the hell they were coming from.
One night I was laying in bed watching a TV show on my ipad. I thought I felt something on my arm, but there was nothing there. A minute later, one of those god damn bugs walked across my ipad screen. I was not amused and when this daring bugger was trapped in the empty pill container, I shook the container like a maraca before giving creepy crawly the big flush. (The shaking of the container was done in anger and acted as a stress reliever).Two nights later, I was again laying in bed when I felt something on my arm again. This time there was a bug on my arm, I freaked out and didn’t sleep much that night.
The following day I discovered a couple more bugs, one on a houseplant and another on a window. “This is fucking ridiculous” I said to myself as I set out to thoroughly check my place from top to bottom in hopes of discovering where the bugs were coming from.
In the far corner of my bedroom, tucked behind the closet door were my two air conditioners. I had taken them out of the windows in early November, stacked them on top of each other and threw a black blanket over them, so they weren’t as noticeable. (Have you figured out where I’m going with this yet?)
I pulled the blanket off the air conditioners and nearly shit myself. There, crawling inside the older a/c, were a whole bunch of the disgusting intruders. My heart was pounding a mile a minute and the air was blue with the vulgarities that came out of my mouth. . I grabbed two very large plastic bags and slipped one around each air conditioner, securely tying each bag so no bugs could escape.
We’ve all heard stories where someone is pinned beneath a car, a fallen tree or other large item and somehow their loved one musters up super hero strength, lifting the heavy item off them. I was kinda like that at this point.
As everyone knows, I can’t lift anything heavier than a cup of coffee or remote control (perhaps a slight exaggeration) but in the state of shock I was in, I fumbled my way down the stairs, then to the shed in the backyard with each bug condo....errrrr, air conditioner. It took two trips but at least the a/c’s and they occupants had finally left the building.
Was the spine tingling creepy adventure finally over, now that I evicted the squatters? Not quite. Even though the air conditioners were no longer in the house, there were still bugs showing up almost daily. I contacted a coop member and she in turn called a bug guy. By this time I had looked online to try and find out what these bugs were. I concluded they must be blood sucking cone nose bugs, who bite and suck blood. When bug guy showed up later to see the live specimen I had saved, he told me what I had were called stink bugs. He said that when I moved the air conditioners, I disrupted their home and since I had sealed every nook and cranny, any stragglers that may not have actually been in the a/c’s when I removed them, were now trapped inside with me and my pets. [Happy, happy, joy, joy]
Bug guy told me stink bugs prefer plants instead of blood and do not typically bite. They got their name from the fact that if you squish them they emit a pungent odour that is very difficult to get rid of (thank god I was flushing them.)
The bugs continued showing up until around the end of January, and as of the time I am writing this, it has been about 14 days since the last stink bug was seen. I was reluctant to share this story for fear no one would want to come over anymore...LOL.
Even though I first noticed these crunchy, creepy, critters around Christmas, when I gave it further thought, something occurred to me. Those air conditioners came inside at the beginning of November and naturally, so did the stink bugs, meaning that I was sleeping in the same room as them for almost two months before the scary saga started.
Now THAT truly stinks!!